What are our legislators thinking?

Have you received an email directing you to a petition to stop drive-thru mastectomies?

I’ve received it many times over the years, and got another one the other day from my cousin. The link is at http://www.lifetimetv.com/reallife/bc/pledges/bc_mast_pledge.html. It’s a legitimate site and the contents are a source of tremendous frustration for me. Please take a moment to read the petition, sign if you agree, and then come back here.

My cousin had copied many family members, and this is what I wrote:

“I know many of you and hope you can tolerate one more comment on this. For those who do not know me, I have just celebrated my 5th year since my breast cancer surgery, and am very happy to say that I'm here. I'm healthy and cancer-free.

According to the Lifetime website: "Lifetime has been working to pass this legislation since 1996 and now has collected more than 10 million petition signatures".

Exactly how many signatures does our government require in order to pass this legislation? Since Lifetime (only one of the supporters) has been working on this since 1996, WHAT ARE OUR LEGISLATORS WAITING FOR?

If you hear anger and frustration on my part, you're right! First of all, finding a second opinion is important to double-check your diagnosis and treatment options. Mastectomy is extremely painful and you're at risk, as with other surgeries, for infection and reaction to medicines. Being in the hospital is the ONLY place you should be following this surgery.

If you are in a position where you know someone who would be responsible for voting for this, can you ask that person to explain what is holding up this common-sense, medically sound, humane legislation? What EXACTLY will it take to end this madness and pass the Breast Cancer Patient Protection Act of 2005?

If you pass along the original email regarding the petition at http://www.lifetimetv.com/reallife/bc/pledges/bc_mast_pledge.html, please include my note. I need some answers, don't you?”

My aunt in Virginia inquired at the Y-ME National Breast Cancer Organization. This note is from Margaret of Y-ME:

“Yes, this is still timely. However, the best thing to do is to ask your friends to get their representatives in Congress to sign on as cosponsors to H.R. 1849 and S.910, the Breast Cancer Patient Protection Act of 2005. They can check whether or not their members have signed on by going to http://thomas.loc.gov/home/thomas.html and putting the bill number into the search feature. Then on the next screen click on Bill Summary and Status. Then click "Cosponsors' and it will give you an alphabetical listing of senators or representatives who have signed to cosponsor the legislation.

For our area of Northern Virginia, neither senator has signed to cosponsor, and Rep. Moran is the only representative who has signed on. From MD, Van Hollen and Wynn have signed on. Neither Maryland senator has signed on. Del. Norton has signed.

And then of course, we must get both House and Senate leadership to agree to bring the bills to the floor.”

My aunt went to the website and wrote: “I found 141 cosponsors are in the House and only 7 in the Senate.”

I would ask of you that if you care about this issue, check on your leaders and push for their sponsorship. Ask them to prod others to pass this Act and insist it be done NOW!

It's been 5 years.

2000: My marriage was happy and we had an 11 year old son. I had a great contract with a fabulous manager and the money was rolling in. My volunteer activities were fulfilling. Stocks were up and business in general was booming.

But I had my very own Y2K problem. I had a suspicious test, did a biopsy that was not conclusive, had another biopsy. This played out over a series of months, at a time of my life where things had been great. I had cancer and my surgery was scheduled for August 2.

It's hard to convey how deeply it hits you when you hear the words that are something along the line of "I'm sorry to tell you this, but...".

I had a feeling this would be bad news, and that's why Bill (my husband) was with me. I had brought pen and paper, was ready to take notes.

Take notes, I did. Now ask me if they made any sense. The answer is no, they didn't. Once you hear the words, your mind races. Is this a simple procedure? Will it just be an excision? Will I have chemo and lose my hair? Will I lose my life? And the fact is that the way my mind works, I thought I could be a goner.

I'd had experiences with people who died of cancer including my mother and two of her sisters. Of course, reading the newspaper, I noted people my age who died of cancer.

There positive role models, too. My sisters were both survivors and I'd had friends and acquaintances who had also survived.

But in the moment of hearing those words "I'm sorry but..." my mind skipped all over the place to the people who'd lived and the ones who had died.

We left the office and went somewhere, I don't remember. I was shaky and scared and calm all at once. I was not ready to die.

One of the hardest parts was telling my family members. Looking at our son and telling him I had cancer, telling him I wouldn't die although I really didn’t feel 100% certain. Telling him that kids can't wish this on a parent so he should not feel guilty – that seemed to calm him. {Now I know what he’d been thinking!} I told him with certainty that I was going to die someday, but not now and not from this. Telling my sisters - that was really hard news to break over the phone. As both had survived their own bouts, they knew what I was up against.

I don't want to go into all the details here of what was done, decisions that were made, the treatments I had and what they were like. I did have surgery, chemo, know what I look like bald. I had two kinds of cancer, one of which was very aggressive so it's a good thing I was proactive in my exams and that I had really great doctors.

I think about it almost every day. Serious illness can be a gift. You have your priorities and material goods are not among them. Think about what is meaningful in life and appreciate it. My husband, son, family and friends are deeply loved and appreciated.

It makes you more fearless in the world. I take more chances in sharing information, just like I'm doing here.

Some people are not open about being survivors, and I understand their reasons. It can knock you out of contention in the workplace and some people will forever tilt their heads and look at you with great concern: "How are you feeling, really...?" And I assure them that I'm fine, and that's truly the case, but that doesn't matter, does it?

I’m aware and am angry as anyone could be that we are not further along with prevention, diagnosis and treatment. I’m impatient with our system of insurance that penalizes the patient for being ill. I’m sick over the needless loss of people who don’t have insurance or are without the resources to find and pay for good care.

Because this is a long subject, I’m going to post a separate note about a petition and lack of action by our government.

Over the years, I went frequently at first to my Oncologist. Then it went to every 3 months. Then every 4 months, then 6 months.

And on August 2, 2005, it was 5 years since my surgery. When I say “I’m glad to be here”, I mean it!

Five years is a magical number to cancer survivors.

Now I’m not “in remission”, I’m CURED!

Suddenly I’m Silent

It was a nasty cough, persistent and annoying. Although I chug-a-lugged cough medicine and hot fluids, downed lozenges, and pumped up the vitamins, this just didn’t stop.

I gave a 2 hour workshop Tuesday morning and coached a client in the afternoon. By the end of that session I was hoarse, and in the morning, I had laryngitis. I went to the doctor, got some pills, cough medicine and allergy medication along with strict orders to avoid talking - even whispering would strain my vocal chords. The pharmacist was speaking softly but when she heard my whisper, she started whispering in return! She is not the only one to have done this.

I’m learning a lot from this experience of not talking for four days and reserving my hoarse voice today.

Our son is pretty good at ready lips and followed my charades. There were certain issues that needed discussion, so pen and pad came out. Among the people I’ve seen, he was the best at lip reading, and I wonder if that’s because he knows me so well or that at 16, he’s used to communicating silently with peers during class.

At home I kept the answering machine on and if my son was around, he was to answer for me and I’d stand by to write notes. Both he and my husband had to make some phone calls for me. It’s made me think of the people who utilize machines to “talk” on the phone, how much personal expression, nuance and emotion is lost in the process. If you’re writing email or IM’s you can include an emoticon so your reader understands more.

I went to the market and when the cashier started to chit-chat, I motioned that I couldn’t talk. She looked at me; spoke a little louder and a little slower, “C-A-S-H OR C-R-E-D-I-T”.

I had a professional meeting and as I enjoy interacting with people, I typed up a list of comments and questions, and at the top explained that I had laryngitis but was not contagious. I wrote things like “how are you”, “what are you up to”, “how’s your family/cats/dogs/horses, etc.” and I’d point to the sentences to get people talking. This did get people talking and laughing. It was good to be posing my questions and just listening.

In my efforts to communicate and put people at ease, I was more expressive and kept an appropriate facial expression – welcoming smile, concern, “and then what” look. I was animated, and went out of my way to “accommodate” others.

If there is some small misunderstanding, it's easier to just let it be than go out of your way to correct it. If you're trying converse by notes, by the time you write a thought, others are onto the next topic.

Working from home, I didn’t need to think much about it, just concentrated on trying to get well and work with some clients via email and messaging.

Had to run over to the market and this time found a clerk who helped me in the self-checkout line. She asked me something and I motioned that I couldn’t speak, and she briefly told me what to do then walked away. If I’d had a follow-up question, I couldn’t have gotten her attention other than running over to her.

Some people have joked that my family must be enjoying this. Yup, that’s funny. You have to assume that either they know my family is funny and sarcastic and has a mean sense of humor OR that they feel my family deserves a break from all the nagging and whining that I do! Quick – which one is it?

Just a brief time of being without a voice has shown me a lot about how isolating this can be, how the person without speech must go out of his/her way to be in this society, and how much you lose when you can’t verbally express yourself.

I’m very grateful this is just for a short time, and have given a lot of thought about people who cannot speak from birth, disease, or surgery. Even if you are fluent in sign language, once you step away from other signers, you’re alone. If you need help you can’t ask for it, if you’re in danger you can’t yell, and if you’re injured or ill you may not be able to communicate your problem.

What work options do you miss out on and what accommodations can be made not just for handling a workload, but incorporating a person into the company?

It’s something to mull over and I hope you have some insights and ideas to share here.

Time for an Update or Two

It's challenging to find enough time in the day for all the things I'd like to do. Like many adults, I'm juggling family, career, volunteer activities and my own hobbies. I'm not the best of jugglers, but I try. This blog is one of the things that fall by the wayside.

I understand that a few people are reading this, but I can't see statistics on this site and don't know how many people are out there. I have received some comments in my personal mailbox but not many here. You're welcome to post and I encourage response.

When I started this blog, I was working part-time at one company, then had two part-time positions, back to one now on to other things. It seems to be a trend, this part-time work.

I decided to go back to HR Consulting, Contract Recruiting and doing Sexual Harassment seminars to comply with AB 1825. You can read more about my business at http://www.ourhrsite.com/scindex.html.

It was not the easiest of decisions to return to consulting. I do enjoy being part of a team, learning from others and contributing on an ongoing basis. The changing nature of the workplace especially as it pertains to my field leads me back to consulting.

Much has been made of offshoring, but outsourcing to other companies or individuals are also front and center. Because companies need flexibility and the laws are becoming so complex, it often pays to hire someone from the outside to handle a project.

I wonder what you think of all this. It seems to me that this gives a company flexibility, but I'm not sure of the long-term impact of the situation. I have a lot of thoughts about this but will spare you. I'm brining it up so I can hear your thoughts, concerns, experiences, and recommendations for best utilizing outsourced labor.

What are your thoughts?